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ENFJ and Enneagram Type 6 Compatibility: Relationships, Friendships, and Partnerships

How compatible are the ENFJ and Enneagram Type 6 patterns of communicating, feeling, and thinking?

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In this article, you’ll find comparisons of two personality types — ENFJs and the Enneagram Type 6s — across four important personality domains: Interpersonal/Communication Style, Emotional Style, Intellectual Style, and Organizational Style.

TraitLab collected data about personality traits from thousands of participants who identified as a particular type from the 16 Personality or Enneagram typology.

For each comparison area below, you’ll see show the average similarities and differences between ENFJs and Type 6s. While these comparisons are useful for understanding broad trends across these types, it’s important to remember that all personality types are oversimplifications. For an assessment of your unique personality, you’ll want to use an assessment that goes beyond single personality types.

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ENFJ and Type 6 Interpersonal and Communication Styles

Your particular style of communicating and interacting with others can be described fairly well by two dimensions: assertiveness and warmth.

Assertiveness describes your tendency to assert yourself, lead, and influence others in social situations, while warmth describes your tendencies to empathize and put others’ needs ahead of your own.

People with the same personality type often share some similarities in assertiveness and warmth. In the graph below, you can see where most ENFJs and most Type 6s fall along both of these dimensions.

First, take a look at where people in each type, on average, fall in this interpersonal space.

Enneagram ENFJ and Type 6 comparison across interpersonal dimensions
A comparison of Enneagram ENFJs and Type 6s along interpersonal dimensions. The blue dot shows the average position of ENFJs, and the blue circle shows where roughly 50% of ENFJs fall in interpersonal space. The orange dot and circle show similar positions for Type 6s.

ENFJs often support, openly sympathize, and actively offer help to others At their best, they are gentle sympathizers, who are easily trusted and accepted. ENFJs may be overly revealing and have difficulty being alone. At their worst, they can require too much attention and admiration from others and be excessively involved in the affairs of others.

Type 6s often respect others, conform to expectations, and ask for guidance. At their best, they are loyal and reliable, and encourage others to guide and help. Type 6s may be overly clingy, gullible, and have difficulty expressing anger, even when appropriate. At their worst, they will try to please others too much, put others’ needs ahead of their own, and allow others to take advantage of them.

One aspect that you and many Type 6s have in common in their interpersonal warmth. Both ENFJs and Type 6s tend to be on the friendlier side and are attentive to the needs and interests of other people, sometimes at the expense of your own goals.

One important difference between you and most Type 6s is in your relative assertiveness and dominance in social situations. Like many ENFJs, you tend to be on the more assertive side and feel comfortable taking charge and making decisions. Often, this pairs well with Type 6s more reserved and passive style, but you’ll want to be careful about being overly domineering, forceful, or direct. Unlike you, Type 6s may need additional time and space to share their thoughts and ideas.

ENFJ and Type 6 Emotional Styles

Another characteristic of your personality is your emotional style — your tendencies towards different kinds of moods. There are two dimensions that influence emotional style: arousal and valence.

Arousal describes your relative energy level across different situations. Those with high baseline levels of arousal tend to be generally more alert, active, and engaged, while those with a lower baseline are more reserved, subdued, and inhibited.

Valence describes whether these moods tend to be positive (pleasant) or negative (unpleasant). People with a more positively valenced style are more likely to experience emotions like joy, enthusiasm, satisfaction, and serenity. People with a more negatively valenced style are more likely to experience sadness, frustration, dissatisfaction, and anxiety.

The graph below shows where each type, on average, usually sits in this emotional space.

ENFJ and Type 6 comparison across emotional (affective) dimensions
A comparison of ENFJs and Type 6s along emotional (or affective) dimensions. The blue dot shows the average position of ENFJs, and the blue circle shows where roughly 50% of ENFJs fall in interpersonal space. The orange dot and circle show similar positions for Type 6s.

ENFJs tend to be energetic and enthusiastic across most situations. They take on new challenges with excitement, confidence, and a sense of adventure. ENFJs are usually more optimistic than most people, and they generally feel like they can handle what life throws at them.

Type 6s have a tendency to be quiet and inhibited. Compared to most people, they can easily drift into gloom and melancholy. They see the glass as half-empty and have a more skeptical outlook and a hesitant approach to life. For better or worse, Type 6s tend to notice the negatives in most situations. In stressful times, they are more likely to withdraw quietly and retreat inward, rather than share their frustration with others.

As with most ENFJs, you tend to have a higher baseline energy level than most Type 6s. Between the two of you, you are more likely to seek out engaging activities — perhaps social events, outdoor adventures, or a new class, depending on your interests. However, you may find that most Type 6s do not share your enthusiasm and excitement. In general, you likely crave stimulation more than your Type 6 counterparts, and balancing your different appetites for excitement can be an ongoing challenge.

Another difference between ENFJs and Type 6 is in their typical emotional valence, which describes tendencies towards positive or negative emotions. You and most ENFJs tend to fall on the more positive side. Compared to most Type 6s, you and most ENFJs experience positive emotions such as joy, satisfaction, and happiness more often than most Type 6s. Type 6s have the opposite pattern, and they tend to gravitate towards more negative emotions.

These subtle emotional differences often surface in your reactions to new information. The same news that sparks enthusiasm in you and most ENFJs can induce worry in Type 6s. Compared to ENFJs, most Type 6s may need additional time and space to recover from stress.

ENFJ and Type 6 Intellectual Styles

Your intellectual style describes how you receive, process, and pursue different kinds of information. Differences in intellectual style are captured well by two dimensions: ideas and aesthetics.

Ideas describes your appetite for new information and your interest in complex, challenging material. People high on the ideas dimension have an appreciation for complexity and technical details. People lower on ideas are less interested in learning for learning’s sake, and they prefer to simplify complex topics down to the essential details.

Aesthetics captures your relative interest and sensitivity to aesthetic information and its emotional impact. People higher on the aesthetics dimension usually have strong artistic interests and a deep appreciation for beauty in many forms. Those lower on aesthetics tend to value practical application over artistic merit and usually adhere to more conventional standards of beauty.

In the graph below, you’ll see where ENFJs and Type 6s, on average, fall in this intellectual space.

ENFJ and Type 6 comparison across intellectual dimensions
A comparison of ENFJs and Type 6s along intellectual dimensions. The blue dot shows the average position of ENFJs, and the blue circle shows where roughly 50% of ENFJs fall in intellectual space. The orange dot and circle show similar positions for Type 6s.

ENFJs tend to be deep thinkers — bright, curious, and philosophical. They are highly receptive to new ideas and drawn to complex, abstract concepts. ENFJs enjoy taking in large amounts of information and typically have one or more creative outlets.

Type 6s are practical realists. They focus on building practical skills and essential knowledge and are less likely to spend time learning for learning’s sake. In addition, they usually value conventional, tangible accomplishments over artistic expression and rarely feel compelled to develop a creative outlet.

As with many ENFJs, you tend to have a stronger need for information and complexity than most Type 6s. You are much more likely to become enamored with a fascinating new idea and dive head first into learning everything you can about it while your Type 6 counterparts are focused on the practical matter in front of them. You may find yourself pulling the conversation to a more theoretical level when you’re together, while your Type 6 partner resists and keeps things down-to-earth.

Another difference between ENFJs and Type 6s is their relative interest in aesthetic, artistic, and emotional experiences. As a ENFJ, you are more likely to value artistic expression and unconventional ways of thinking, while your Type 6 counterpart is more practical and traditional. ENFJs tend to reflect more on emotional experiences, looking for patterns and connections, and they are more receptive to eccentricity and fantasy. In contrast, Type 6s often avoid reading too deeply into their emotions, and they can be dismissive or skeptical about unconventional ways of thinking.

ENFJ and Type 6 Organizational Styles

Your organizational style describes your habits around organization and planning. Your organizational style influences how you structure your time and physical space. Differences in organizational style fall along two dimensions: industriousness and orderliness.

Industriousness describes your persistence, need for achievement, and intensity of focus. People higher on industriousness usually organize their behavior around a few important long-term goals. People lower on industriousness are usually more focused on the present and will more easily change their focus when new opportunities appear.

Orderliness describes your need for regularity, order, and structure in your environment. People higher on orderliness prefer tidy, organized physical spaces, detailed schedules, and reliable routines. People lower on orderliness can tolerate more disorganization and prefer a more spontaneous, unstructured approach.

The graph below shows the average position of ENFJs and Type 6s along these dimensions of organizational style.

ENFJ and Type 6 comparison across organizational dimensions
A comparison of ENFJs and Type 6s along organizational dimensions. The blue dot shows the average position of ENFJs, and the blue circle shows where roughly 50% of ENFJs fall in organizational space. The orange dot and circle show similar positions for Type 6s.

ENFJs are usually systematic and highly organized. They like setting big, long-term goals and then creating detailed plans to accomplish them. ENFJs are generally good at ignoring distractions and making steady progress through consistent routines and habits.

Type 6s need clear structure, detailed processes, and standard procedures. They avoid improvising whenever possible, and Type 6s lean on highly structured routines and environments to help them maintain focus and avoid distractions.

As with most ENFJs, you and many Type 6s can clash over your need to set goals and use time efficiently. While you have an easier time getting down to work and staying focused, your Type 6 counterpart may be more easily distracted and unpredictable. Working consistently with a narrow focus often comes naturally to many ENFJs like you, but you may find that Type 6s benefit from additional structure to keep them on track. While you enjoy planning and tend to mind the future, your Type 6 counterpart helps you enjoy the present, injecting some much-needed spontaneity into your schedule.

However, ENFJs and Type 6s tend to be neat, tidy, and organized. You both rely on high amounts of structure and routine and compared to most people, you have lower tolerances for messiness and disorder. With a few exceptions, both of you stick closely to most social conventions and feel uncomfortable straying from them.

How to Identify Your Personality Types

Most people have complex personalities, and they don’t fit perfectly into a single personality type.

With TraitLab’s comprehensive analyses of your traits, strengths, and interests, you can see how your personality compares to every type from the Enneagram and 16 Personality typologies. Start building your personality profile by creating a free account today.

ENFJ Compatibility with Other Enneagram Types

For comparisons between ENFJs and other Enneagram types, visit any of the type pairings below:

Enneagram Type 6 Compatibility with Other 16 Personality Types

For comparisons between Type 6s and other types from the 16 Personality typology, visit any of the pairings below:

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